Building others up not tearing them down. 

I had always seen when I was growing up that if someone did something you didn’t like you would rip their choices to shred and laugh until your hearts content. That was all well and good until you were on the other end of it. It took me a few years, until I started writing my A Level history coursework and did some extensive research of the campaigns of the suffragists and suffragettes, that I realised women are so much stronger working as one.

I currently have some very strong empowering women in my life whom I look up to massively, who have dealt with so many weakening things and come out of top of them. This has made me realise that we don’t need to tear strong women down and shit on what they believe in because that doesn’t show their character or their flaws; just yours. We shouldn’t see women who are so confident in themselves that they can and will do anything they want to, and think “eurgh they’re so arrogant and self centred”. We should be proud of them, we should be inspired by them and we certainly shouldn’t be trying to bring them down.

The society we live in always aims to bring people down, our front pages consist of “this kardashian has no bra on” or “this singer was seen leaving a hotel with this other random person #slut”. I am going to be blunt here. Who the fuck cares? And quite honestly who is going to be happier in the long run, the kardashian feeling free and comfortable in their body/ the singer having some great (consensual) sex or the journalist sat writing the article with nothing interesting or intellectually engaging to write? Yeah definitely not the one dragging someone through the mud. We need to stop labelling people sluts or whores or boring or whatever your opinion is and say actually this person is doing what they want and is enjoying themselves. Good on them for having some crazy body confidence and good on them for expressing their sexuality in a safe and gratifying way.

In a world where everything is a competition to reach the biggest bank account or biggest follower base we forget about the littler and more important things in our lives such as supporting people around us, or just doing what we love because we love it. We are taught in this world that everything has to have a purpose, you can only do A if you want to get to B. We need to unlearn that. Fast. We need to realise there isn’t just the end goal we need to reach, we need to enjoy the journey to the goal. I only have a few followers on here and on Instagram but that doesn’t matter, I will keep writing. I will write and regardless whether I am the only person reading what I’m writing I will continue. We need to unlearn some toxic things in our lives to then move on and be great human beings who influence and empower over people.
Looking back to 100 years ago, women decided to work together against societal norms and the expectation of women and fought for their rights. They fought for what they deserved. And they didn’t do it by shitting on people who already had the rights. They tried in any possible way to gain what they needed in a way which would get the attention of the right people but also show women as a force to be reckoned with. We need a little bit of that fight right now I think.

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